Scrapper's Prayer

Bless me, Scrap Fairy, for I have sinned,
I know that’s hard to believe;
But it’s not my fault, I’m a victim, you see,
Of a sickness, a curse, a disease...

They say that confession is good for the soul,
But I’m not convinced that that’s true.
So I’ll tell you my faults and shortcomings,
And I’ll leave the decision to you.

That scrapbooking thing has got me for sure;
I start with the best of intentions!
Just let me check the CK website--
Oh look! A list of conventions!

Snacking is good to help with my scrappin’
Though I tend to overindulge.
Cakes and cookies and chocolates galore!
My bulges are starting to bulge!

Oh my! How I buy the things I don’t need
Eyelets and ribbons and vellums.
If anyone asks, “I’ve had it for years!“
At least, that’s what I tell ‘em!

A scrap room? What’s that? Stuff’s all over the house
I suffer from *CHAOS,* you know,
No one comes, no one visits, except UPS
He’s my very best friend, that Joe!

Buy now! It’s on sale! They won’t have it again!
The gadgets, the papers, the glues
Look at the money that I can save!
How can I possibly lose???

Organization is an area where I am certainly lacking
I need help with that, others say
But how can I do it? I‘ve got things to do!
How can I waste a whole day?

So here I sit amongst all of my clutter
Housekeeping’s a thing of the past
Dusting and vacuuming and tidying up
What’s the point??? It just doesn’t last!

I have too many ideas and not enough time
They say that denial is rough
I have it...I know it....can’t find it....
Oh well....I’ll just buy some more stuff.

I know that they pay me to do a good job
But this 8 to 5 job gets so stressful
I need a vacation...I need to relax...
And then I will be more successful!

I spend time at work doing scrapbooking things
I search for a phrase or a verse
The perfect layout is all that I need
My addiction is more like a curse!

I tell my husband that if I should die
The best thing for him to do
Is to have a garage or a fire sale
And be sure to include all of Y-O-U!

I guess I’m a sinner, so give me my penance
And hurry! Send me on my way!
I’ve a 40% coupon right here in my purse
Oh my gosh....it expires today!